She was 21 then. Very pretty and used to look out of the world in a saree, attending a wedding. She was a college kid but that didn’t stop anyone from coming up with marriage proposals because everyone wanted a pretty daughter-in-law like her. She is 31 now, a successful professional, still very pretty and still single. The proposals at weddings that used to amuse her before amusing her still. She has decided she is happy with the single life but people around her aren’t. The matchmaking drama continues. If you are single during the Indian wedding season you will be able to identify with this.
The elders present at the ceremony are likely to make you feel like a leper with their questions and cross-questions. Such is the Indian marriage conundrum. You might as well carry a bottle of vodka with you to gulp down to survive this ordeal and if you can manage to come out of it unscathed then just go ahead and give yourself a bravery award.
And in case you want a survival guide for attending a wedding when you are single then you have come to the right place.
12 Things you will face if you are single during the Indian wedding season
Be ready to juggle all kinds of proposals, comments and advice that could drive you up the wall. If you are single take a deep breath and maybe do some pre-wedding meditation before you don that expensive lehenga. Because you will need everything you have to dodge those verbal missiles. It’s not easy but we assure you you will survive an Indian wedding being single.
1. My son is a doctor
This comes from the aunties who have nothing better to do than to hunt down single women with hawk eyes. You could replace the doctor with an engineer, professor, etc. But the thought behind it remains the same – “You are a single woman and so is my son. So the two of you should get hitched.”
You are right – no one has told them that something like chemistry and compatibility exists.
Being single is the only criterion that makes you eligible to get married to a random aunty’s son. He earns well and what about you? Your career dreams should be on the compromising lines. After all, you will have to take care of household, have kids, and raise a family.
Thank you but no thank you aunty.
2. What kind of man are you looking for?
Being single in India means relatives have the incessant desire to do matchmaking at marriages.
Indian wedding crowds are the unbeatable places for unwelcome marriage proposals. You are asked about the man of your dreams as if he is waiting for you at the wedding functions. As if when you’ll start describing his qualities, some Raj Malhotra will be walking towards you in slow motion with romantic music being played in the background.
Yes, please read that as a sarcastic comment. Yes, to shut them up you could give them the reply, “I am not looking for a man. I like women!” Watch her reaction!
The ball gets in your court!
3. Will you plan such a luxurious wedding?
Oh, didn’t you know that there is a “big wedding” contest that is running in India? Funny as it may sound, most relatives at an Indian wedding feel this way. They don’t realize that you might be a woman who would rather spend lakhs travelling than get married. When such mindsets would change, only the Lord knows. But be happy that you are single at an Indian wedding and you are not getting into a situation like this anytime soon.
Tell them, “I am riding solo.” And see their reaction.
4. Why are you still alone?
You might be busy building your career or you might be still healing your heart after a bitter break up. However, none of that matters to the relatives if you are a single woman of marriageable age in India.
It’s high time when you must get a ‘complete’ family, ‘settle down’ in time, and take care of your ghar-grahasthi. After all, this is the sole reason of your existence. For how long you will be struggling with singleness?
7. Do you like him?
The suddenness of this question might catch you by surprise but you will be astonished to know how closely you have been watched during the function.
Just leave it as a silent smile or a tight hug and keep the talking and explaining for a later time.
It is true that women look as lovely as a bride. However, there are unmarried girls in India who have dreams other than the big fat Indian wedding to pursue. It is about time people began respecting that.
