Are you having a hard time cracking the code of how to make a girl fall for you? Well, believe me, you are not alone. After all, the way to a woman’s heart is quite challenging. It takes a special man and special efforts to woo a special woman. And boy is the millennial woman a hard nut to crack! She is self-aware and self-sufficient. She is ambitious and doesn’t hesitate to spell out her boundaries loud and clear. She is a force to be reckoned with and that’s the reason you are so crazy about her.
The tried and tested, old-school tricks of the trade won’t work. The world has moved on from them. You have to be creative, politically correct, smart, and sassy and more importantly, know what NOT to say to make a girl fall for you. Confused? Don’t be, make our guide your Bible to know exactly what are the things to do to make a girl think about you.
How To Make A Girl Fall For You – 21 Simple Ways
There are a lot of dos and don’ts of dating etiquette. The key is to customize them to the situation. You certainly cannot get a girl to like you if your approach is out of sync with her romantic expectations. Especially if she has no feelings for you, the game gets even trickier and you need to tread very carefully. We’re here to hold your hand through this daunting process with these 21 simple tips on how to make a girl fall for you:
1. Do not flaunt your wealth
You have a fine apartment in Manhattan. An Ivy League degree. You love sports cars and think you are Zac Efron’s long-lost brother. Good for you. But flaunting your qualifications or material accumulations is one of the first-date mistakes you should certainly avoid.
What you should actually do is play it cool and subtly get her to notice the things you want her to! For example, you can be more active on social media and make sure she sees what you are up to. Or you can spread the news via mutual friends. That way it will be more subtle, and you don’t come across as a pretentious guy. The trick is to let her find out from others and be impressed, instead of overwhelming her with a list of why you are the great guy.
2. Be a good listener
Now, this rule does not just apply to wooing a girl but in general too. Learn to listen. A good way to get a woman to fall for you is to show you are genuinely interested in her as a person and not just her looks. Girls’ DMs are flooded with men calling them hot and beautiful. Don’t be another thirsty guy. Even when texting, if you really want to make a girl fall for you on chat, you have to show her that she has your undivided attention.
One study conducted by Faye Doell (2003) showed that there are two different types of listening: “listening to understand” and “listening to respond.” Those who “listen to understand” have greater satisfaction in their interpersonal relationships. So, make a conscious effort to really hear her out and understand what she’s trying to tell you.
3. Compliment, don’t flatter
It is one thing to pay a compliment and another thing to indulge in empty flattery. Every woman loves a compliment but knows when you’re being disingenuous. She will love it if you tell her she’s cute, even so, it bodes well for you to not go overboard with the praises; please do also give credit to her intelligence. Especially if you are dating an independent woman, she will definitely want to be appreciated for more than just how she looks.
Be genuine and when you want to pass a flattering remark, ensure you know what you are talking about, even if you are just casually flirting. A sincere comment might even get her to take you more seriously. Women like a man who will challenge them intellectually and in other ways instead of blindly agreeing with them on everything. So, when you desperately want to make a girl who has no feelings for you fall for you, be you. Compliment all her wonderful attributes, but at the same time be honest with your opinions and intentions.
4. Show some chivalry
Chivalry is not dead, it’s a part of good etiquette just like table manners. So go ahead, stand up when a woman approaches you and pull out a chair for her or help her with the coat (provided that she is okay with it). There are ways of treating a woman that never go out of style. But you better not come off as a hero whose sole duty is to protect her from this spiteful world.
For example, don’t try to pick a fight with every guy who looks in her direction. Don’t tell her to stop dressing a certain way or stop talking to her guy best friends because you know they cannot be trusted. She has survived well so far and is capable of doing so in the future. Show her that you can be a pillar of support for her rather than the person who takes away her choices.
5. Tidy it up
The metrosexual man may be a thing of the past but being well-groomed is always fashionable. When you go out with a girl, put in the effort to look good, clean, and smell fresh. You will have better luck winning her over when you’re clean-shaven or have a nicely trimmed beard, clean clothes, neat shoes (kind of an important one), and the subtle smell of the musk or aftershave than if you show up resembling Tom Hanks from Cast Away. These little things can, in fact, make or break her impression of you.
Also, if you are inviting her home, tidy up. It reflects that you’re a man who takes care of himself and values hygiene. If you’re not sure how to go about it exactly, it’s wise to call in the reinforcements and seek help from a female friend on grooming tips to make you look dapper. Taking a girl’s perspective into account might actually help.
6. Understand her love language
To make a girl fall for you on WhatsApp is a completely different ballgame. When you are chatting with a woman, be a bit careful of how you text her. First, try and gauge her personality and figure out what makes her tick. Maybe, she secretly loves a lot of text messages, or even little love notes and emails.
Psychotherapist Jui Pimple explains, “Verbal expressions of love and affection are key to people for whom words of affirmation are the primary form of love language. They will frequently use statements such as “I love you” or “I am glad to have you in life”. People with this love language also like to hear such words from their partner; it’s how they feel loved and reassured, and thereby safe to express their own feelings.”
7. Surprise her with small gestures
Surprises do not just mean sending gifts on special occasions. Instead, be thoughtful about your romantic gestures. Make a note of these cute tips for courting a woman…Surprise her with her favorite food when she is PMSing. Or a cute polaroid that she can stick on her wall. Or maybe her favorite flower. The most important thing is to tell her how much you value her.
Even research shows that expressing gratitude increases comfort in relationships. So, ignite the spark of your love life by expressing gratitude regularly. Here are some phrases that you can use to appreciate her and make her fall in love with you:
- “Thank you for…”
- “I understand”
- “I love you”
- “I am thankful for…”
- “This is not your problem. It’s OUR problem”
8. Don’t send unsolicited dick pics
Looking for tips on how to get a girlfriend? Up your social media game. Nick Jonas may have won over Priyanka Chopra by sliding into her DMs but you need to have a certain style and sass to pull it off. To make a girl fall for you online might not be as easy for the average Joe as it was for Nick.
Also, when you reach a certain comfort level of chatting, some of you think sending unsolicited d*** pics is a ‘sexy’ way to make a girl fall for you on WhatsApp or social media. Hear it from us, loud and clear – it is inappropriate and gross unless you have her informed and enthusiastic consent.
9. Make her laugh
Everyone loves a funny man. If you have a good sense of humor that does not include borrowed jokes or stale one-liners, the chances of you winning a girl over increase. Some women could love your dry sense of humor and have a great time but be careful, some might not get the punchlines. If she has your kind of sense of humor and loves pranking the way you do, then she is sure to be the perfect partner in crime.
Here again, authenticity is the key to making a girl fall for you. Do not pretend to be funny or make an exaggerated attempt at humor. Say what comes to you naturally, so she can really see you for who you are. If your vibe matches hers, you’re sure to catch her attention.
10. Be friendly with her friends
Single women, more often than not, are quite influenced by their friends. Being nice to her friends is definitely a big prerequisite for winning her over. Even more so when you want to make a teenage girl fall for you. You have to get along with her coterie of friends because they probably all sit together and analyze every single thing that you do.
It’s certainly one of the smartest things to do to make a girl think about you. When she sees that you’re not only making genuine attempts to get to know her but also the people she’s the closest to, you will certainly make an impression. Make an attempt to meet them, chat them up, be warm (without being too friendly as that can come off wrong), and show them your nice-guy side. Her friends telling her you are a good person to hang out with will only bolster your odds of winning her over.
11. Give her space
As a single woman, I know how important ‘space’ is. We singletons sneer at girls who can’t breathe without their boyfriends. At the same time, we love the attention and fuss too. So, as a guy in love, what do you need to do to make a girl fall for you? Pay attention and spend time with her but don’t smother her.
Space in a relationship is not an ominous sign. From time to time, give her (and yourself) a break. And let distance make her heart grow fonder. Talking about healthy space in a relationship, psychologist Jaseena Backer previously told Bonobology, “This space should be comfortable enough for the partners and not big enough for the entry of a third party.”
12. Make it on time for a date
The worst thing you can do to a girl you have the hots for is to make her wait or stand her up on a date. It’s a golden rule and one of the easy ways to be romantic – always be on time for a date. The moment you mess this up, you have already gotten off on the wrong foot. It’s just a decent thing to do. If you can’t make it, for whatever reason, be sensible and inform her way before and apologize profusely. Do not cancel a date at the last moment unless it’s an absolute emergency. If you do, make sure you make it up to her.
13. Stay connected
So your first date went off really well and you are both looking forward to the next one. Now, just because you have some time to ponder on second-date ideas, don’t get complacent. You cannot just walk off after the first date and act busy. Stay connected between the first and second dates. Keep in touch often, if not every day, because that will help you make a girl fall for you online. Drop her a text, ask how her day was, and share music recommendations and memes. It will smoothen your path to make a girl fall in love with you even more.
14. Make her feel loved inside and outside the bedroom
Want to learn how to make a girl fall for you? Learn the art of great lovemaking and how to satisfy her in bed but also make her feel loved and cared for. When, after a few dates, you spend a night together, take the time to show you care too. Girls judge guys on how they behave in bed so please no wham, bam, goodbye ma’am!
Sexologist Dr. Rajan Bhonsle advises, “Non-sexual displays of affection such as holding hands, hugging, cuddling, and kissing are all immensely important in making two partners feel more connected and bonded to each other.” So, make an effort to make your partner feel loved outside the bedroom if you want to amp up the heat inside.
15. Don’t make her feel flawed
When you get to know her, you will not only see her good side but also her dark side. There will be days when she will be cranky. On some occasions, she might feel less than confident. She may feel she looks awful. Be kind to her on those days. Deal with her imperfections and idiosyncrasies and show her that you are willing to stay with her through it all. Trust me, this is your best shot to make a girl who has no feelings for you fall for you.
Looking for simple ways to win a woman’s heart? When she’s PMS-ing and going through mood swings, don’t diss her feelings. Be supportive and understanding and she will find a gem in you. When she is anxious/vulnerable and shares a traumatic experience with you, don’t label her as an attention-seeker. She is looking for a safe home in you. Prove her right and make her feel secure, won’t you?
16. Challenge her
This is a love trick that has stood the test of time. No matter how crazy you are about her, do not reveal all your cards the first time you meet her or even on the first few dates. Keep the mystery. Keep her guessing. Many women lose interest quickly, especially when they feel like the other person is falling for them too fast.
Don’t come across as too overeager and make her curious about you too. Women and girls do like a little bit of a chase even though they might not admit it. It is these love games that make the dating experience so exciting. She might play hard to get, so play along and enjoy the fun.
17. Do not hesitate to express yourself
The adage that men should not show their emotions is oh-so last century. Do you cry when you see an emotional movie? Let her see that side of you. Or if you feel scared or vulnerable about something, open up to her. Showing your real sensitive side instead of a macho façade can stir up feeling in her heart. She wants to know your real side so be as authentic as you can with her.
Relationship expert Ridhi Golechha says, “Guys end up suppressing their emotional pain, which makes it more intense. They put on a fake mask of courage and are not able to receive the empathy that somebody who shows vulnerability is able to receive. Also, guys use other channels to direct their pain (like anger, revenge, aggression, or physical abuse).” If you truly want to build a strong emotional connection with this girl, you have to find a way to break away from these stereotypical behavior patterns.
18. Be open to criticism
A girl would love it if you aren’t rigid/set in your ways and open to constructive criticism. Even studies show that if feedback is given respectfully and with good intentions, it can motivate a person to improve. So, if she tells you that you can work on your discipline in your personal and professional life, don’t get defensive or withdraw into a shell. Instead of taking their words to your heart, look at them as an opportunity to improve yourself instead.
Related Reading: 15 Proven Ways To Show Someone You Love Them
19. Respect her career
You are interested in her, we get that, but if you want to win her love, show that you respect her in every way. Be genuinely interested in her career moves, and appreciate her achievements and the things that matter to her. “I’m so proud of everything you are and how hard you work every single day” is one of the things to say to make a girl fall in love with you.
Not everything is about rosy, delicate, and romantic words. Sometimes plain appreciation can do the work for you. Don’t hesitate to tell her how proud you are of her. Women love men who value equality and understand the importance of respect in a relationship. What better way to show her that you are a secure man than standing by your woman as she rises high in her career?
20. Show her you are serious about her
Unless you are a commitment-phobe or just looking for something fun and casual at the moment, you would want to seal the deal with the woman of your dreams. So, don’t be afraid to let her know that you’re emotionally invested in her. Nothing impresses a woman more than a man who knows what he wants.
So to make a girl fall for you, make her see that you are not just fooling around (unless that’s what you’re both looking for). This wins her trust like nothing else. Especially if you want to make a girl fall for you when she has a boyfriend already, you need to show her that you are willing to go the distance with her. That is the only way she will know you are worth it.
21. Be honest with her
Lastly, you can make someone fall in love with you by being honest and completely upfront. It could be sharing minute details with her, like your ex sending you a birthday text or a flirty DM from someone. The tips on how to make a woman fall for you end with being transparent about the little things instead of hiding them. Trust me, loyalty is such a turn-on!
Key Pointers
- Up your dating game, flowers and chocolates are too mainstream
- Show her love in her love language
- The way to a woman’s heart is by making feel special but not smothered
- Give her sincere compliments to make her fall in love with you
- Surprise her (not just on special occasions) but also on random days
- Be open/flexible to take constructive criticism and work on it
- Be honest by showing transparency and treat her respectfully, as an equal
In a nutshell, if you are true to yourself and listen to your heart, you do not need to put in a lot of effort to make a girl fall for you. It happens organically, and believe me, that’s the most beautiful way to be. Make her feel secure and let her find a friend in you. Also, don’t forget to work on yourself. The more you are at peace with yourself, the more a woman would want to be with you.
This article has been updated in January 2023.
